Sexy Revenge

Sexy Revenge
By Lee Gerstmann
Copyright ©2007 Lee Gerstmann

Part One: The Situation

They are preparing to say goodbye. Their date lasted all day. She suggested they hold hands as long as possible. Everything was fine but tomorrow will be another day. He says, “Thank you for the companionship. I hope we can do this again, later.” She says, “I don’t see any reason to stop.” He laughs. “Wouldn’t it be great if we never had to let go?” “We aren’t going to let go.” “That’s funny but, seriously, I do need to do some things.” “I’ll do those things with you.” “You’re great but, really, I need to leave.” “It’s not going to happen.”






She says, “There’s nothing to worry about. My hand will take care of you.” He says, “This is a bit too surreal.” He notices they are still joined but now he is afraid of what might happen. She seemed nice enough when they met last week at the Laundromat but he was judging mostly by her style of dressing and how she wore her shirt tucked in. He was happy when he saw her wearing a tucked-in shirt this morning but now he wonders if her preference for tightness includes handholding rituals, also. He says, “Maybe we won’t go out again.” She says, “I’m not listening to a word you’re saying. I won’t let you get away.”






He tries to let go of her hand but encounters a problem. Her grip is firm. He continues wiggling his hand but she sticks like a piece of tape. She says, “Stop resisting. You’ll only make a fool of yourself in front of the neighbors.” He says, “Just give me time. I’ll escape.” She says, “You make it sound like something bad, like we’re enemies or something. You’re being mean and I don’t like it.” “I wouldn’t act this way if you weren’t so crazy.” “You’re getting exactly what you deserve. You were checking me out at the Laundromat, looking at me as if I was just an image and not a real person. Now you know I’m real because I’m holding on to you and I’m never going to stop holding on to you.” “It sounds like you’re teaching me a lesson.” “I guess so.”






She continues walking down various streets, dragging him along. She sings to herself, happy with her catch. This is a moment of pure rebellion where rules of logic do not apply. He is her trinket that she obtained during her travels to the land of folly. There is nothing like the feeling of complete control when all one has to do is lead another just by the mere physical essence of restraint. As far as she is concerned, he can moan and groan and twist and turn or whatever else he wants to try but he has no choice other than keep moving. The air is fresh and the breeze is blowing so the day is perfect for making two people into one entity. He ought to enjoy this.






Part Two: Thirty Minutes Later

They walk in the bar. He says, “I need a drink to get me through this.” She cries. “You think there’s something wrong with me.” “I don’t like feeling trapped.” “You’re hurting my feelings. Here I am, making your time with me a special and continuous thing of beauty and you act like I’m low class.” “Just be quiet for a while. After I have a beer, I’ll be feeling a little better. Then, I’ll probably think I’m imagining this and it will all go away.” “You don’t understand how upset I am. I cling to you but you don’t want me.” He shakes his head. “Whatever.” She says, “I’m better than that. I won’t let you put me down. I’m a quality person and you’re lucky to have me, so there.”






He says, “I’ll be right back. I just have to go to the bathroom.” She says, “You’re not going anywhere.” “Come on, be reasonable, for Pete’s sake. You can wait for me outside if you’re worried about my running off.” “You really think I’m stupid, don’t you? Once we break contact, it’s over. I told you I will not let go of your hand. Now, deal with it!” “What am I supposed to do?” He tugs his hand. She secures her grip. “You’re making lame excuses to break free from me. You said you wanted something to drink so get a beer or don’t get a beer but quit complaining. We’re here to have a good time.”






She says, “Let’s discuss this. We shouldn’t be angry. Come and sit down with me.” He says, “Okay but wait a second. I’ll be right back. I’m going to get us some beers.” He takes a few steps but she keeps a hold of him. “You don’t need anything. I just want us to talk and work this out. Please be reasonable.” He says, “There’s nothing to talk about. You’re under some weird spell and beer will do you good. Don’t worry about letting go. We’ll still be mentally holding on.” “Please just sit down. We need to be serious about this. We need to plan our life together. I want us to be happy.” “If I sit with you, can we discuss possible options?” “We can’t discuss separation but we can discuss other things.” “Then there’s no point.” “Please just sit with me for a few minutes. I’ll let you talk about whatever you want.”






She says, “Okay, now it’s time for the bonding process.” He asks, “What do you mean?” She says, “As we keep holding on, our energies will flow together. We will become more and more alike. We both have long hair and we both wear our shirts tucked in. Later, we will think the same thoughts and will forget we used to be two separate people.” “Are you on something?” “Yes. I’m getting a high from your energy. Let’s just sit here until closing time and stare at each other. It will be the ultimate trip.” “But…” “Sssh. Look at me. This is perfection.” He feels caught in a sexy web of insanity. He thinks to himself that, if this is perfection, trouble cannot be all that bad.